Container

I'm part of a community of forward-moving people, all of whom are committed to thrive in this world through feeling our emotions, moving our bodies and living transparent lives. What an amazing experiment it is!

I posted the below entry on a private forum we share to keep us connected on a 24/7 basis. It is here that we offer one another support, love, feedback and encouragement. As I submitted it, I heard from my Guides that they wanted me to post it here too. So, following their guidance, here it is...

I have an image that will not leave my mind...

I see a huge glass container. Sometimes I am inside it. Sometimes I'm looking in. Sometimes I'm close. Sometimes I'm distant. The glass container is intricate, beautiful and full of delicious things. Love. Joy. Celebration. Brightness. At first, all I see is the glorious nature of the glowing brilliance from within. I can only focus on the almost-blinding light. Then I begin to notice... black spots. Big. Black. Spots. When I am outside the container, I cannot see into the container where the black spots are. However I can see a golden gossamer stream slowly seeping outward from them and I feel a sadness so, so deep when I watch it that I ache with it. When I am within the container, those black spots are some sort of entity that stretches inward, squeezing the space and filling up the core with an energy that oozes and seethes and I feel scared and angry.

I'm wondering into this image. Is it me? Am I the container? Is it our community? Where am I withholding? Where am I creating black spots for energy leaks and opening up my core to dangerous toxins? Where is that happening in the community?

As I loop into individuals in our community and the community as a whole, I feel so scared. I feel angry. I feel sad. Sad. Sad. Sad. And then I feel terror. My Mother Bear energy comes on so big to protect "us" from something that seems to be coming from within, but I dont' even know what it is. I don't know where it is. I don't know how to stop it. I don't know how to heal it. I don't know how to love it. I feel uncertain AND so full of love at the same time that I feel disoriented most of the time. So what I'm finding is that I am going further and further into me, to fill me up, to patch my black spots, to close my leaks and to clean up my container so that I am solidly transparent and powerfully strong. I'm doing that for me and wondering if I can - or how I can - lovingly inspire each of you to do the same so our unique container is solidly transparent, as well.

I KNOW who I am and why I am here. I feel grateful about that.

I felt so strongly to post this, having no idea where I was going with it, but simply knowing I had to share.

I love you. All of you.

Embracing the Darkness

It was an overcast day with snow coming down so wet and heavy that it turned my city suddenly into a saturated, wintery scene. My daughter and I entered the post office, gathered the mail from my P.O. box and stood in the warmth to read through it. The snow melted into my hair and dripped onto my nose. Upon completion, I grabbed her hand and walked out into the dripping-wet day...

To continue reading, CLICK HERE.

WE - "What is Your Favorite Comfort Food?"

To play along with us, go to Amanda's blog for details on the Weekend Exposure Project.

Image found through Google Image Search and posted by Eat Local Blog HERE.

Post #800

It seems somewhat appropos to do a ceremonial 800th post. Wow! 800 pieces of wittiness and wisdom from me! Can ya even stand it??? LOL

Thing is, I don't have much wisdom or wit this morning. My brain is stirring for other things, so I thought I would share with you my JenGie reading. (to learn more about what JenGie is, CLICK HERE.)

Friday morning, I began to get the first stirrings of illness. It was interesting watching the symptoms creeping up on me. First one then the next one. I was speaking with Jen while they appeared and on the other end, between coughing spasms, she was trying to be supportive. I finished my project and went to bed. I spent the rest of the day and on until noon Saturday in bed drinking lots of Emergen-C and taking high dosages of Oscilloccinum. The symptoms have stayed in check.

This morning, I did a JenGie reading...

House of Light
~Yellow~
Each day is a fresh start. Use it wisely.

House of Order
~Five~
See your vision through completion. Visualize your creations as whole, complete and fabulous!

I smiled as I read that because it is SO applicable with where I am. I have chosen to do a revision of my website and get it on a free server so that I can get rid of the $50/month hosting fee. It is a HUGE process. What better time to do it than while I am sick???!

It's funny. When I'm sick, I stay in and be still, physically. But my brain goes wild and I will literally go mad if I don't create during the physical stillness. Today I am using my brain power to see this project completed and fabulous. I feel excited!!!

With love,
Angie

Appreciation #166/365

*The first step of the sentencing process for my former husband is over. Two years behind bars is the beginning of what is to come for him. I feel sad. *The weather for the last 10 days has been delicious and there's more on the way! *A hot white decaf mocha with caramel sauce and hazelnut. YUMMMM! *Scoping out tables in the coffee shop so that I can move somewhere with a plug, spying someone packing up, swooping in with my stuff, feeling like a vulture and laughing right out loud about that. *Quiet nights with my daughter. *Watching The Little Princess with her, feeling the tenderness the movie evoked for her and being able to comfort her. -Tenderly loving my life and my freedom today.

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #165/365

*Talking and laughing with my best friend, Jen Halterman, on her radio show Everyday Joy. If you'd like to listen in on our conversation and laugh with us, join us at her BlogTalk Radio archive: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/Everyday-Joy-/2009/11/06/Everyday-Joy. It's guaranteed to be a good time! *Friends who inspire me to be even greater. *The surprise offer to housesit for friends which is providing me a landing space right in the middle of my life. *The offer to experience something totally new and gain a new skill set. *Knowing that my new opportunity is with an amazing musician, Leraine Horstmanshoff. -Feeling so very grateful to BE ALIVE!

Grace in Small Things

Laughter and Consciousness

Jen Halterman and I had a BLAST playing this morning on her radio show Everyday Joy. If you'd like to laugh, listen in on an intimate conversation, and gain some skills of consciousness, visit her archive at: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/Everyday-Joy-/2009/11/06/Everyday-Joy.

I'd love to have you reply back with your experience of our time.

Appreciation #164/365

*Witnessing the joy of my close friend. *Feeling my feelings in the moment. What an incredible skill I've learned! *Requesting and receiving support. *Feeling scared and brave at the same time. *Having the balls to tell the D.A. that I disagreed with his commitment to get a life sentence. *Knowing that I am a safe space for people. *Feeling love, radiating love, being love. -Grateful!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #163/365

*hulu.com rocks! I love watching whatever I want whenever I want. *Watched a show called Strictly Sexual the other night that was an interesting twist on the cabana boy theory and actually found myself shuddering and crying with the anger intensity of one of the story lines. It was all too familiar. *My health. *Working on my website all by myself and figuring out html on my own. Cool! *Understanding mentors who cut me slack when I forget to do it myself. *Remembering, knowing and being. *My beautiful daughter who is a joy every single day of my life. *"Standard Time" because I appreciate "gaining" that hour back. However, it still messes with my inner clock. -Feeling grateful to be alive!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #162/365

*YES! My book, Above the Clouds ~ A Courageous Journey of Hope, Love and Revelation is available to purchase through Earth Friendly Publishing at www.earthfriendlypublishing.com/Above-the-Clouds.html. *A totally relaxing day. *Making a roast and vegetables that tasted just like mom's! *The sounds of autumn. *People across the nation curious about and purchasing my book! SO COOL!!! *Internet marketing. Makes it so fun and simple! *Good friends. *Being a mother. *My beautiful daughter. -Feeling in love with me!

Grace in Small Things

Vibrantly Alive!

The trees have donned their vibrant autumn colors just in time to catch the first heavy, wet snow of winter and each time my world arrives at this place in the seasonal evolution, I feel awed and grateful. What I appreciate most is that it seemingly happens over night. One day it's green outside. The next day...

To continue reading, CLICK HERE.

WE - "What Are You Indulging In?"

To play along with us, go to Amanda's blog for details on the Weekend Exposure Project.

Image found through Google Image Search and posted by SoCoBuzz Blog HERE.

Appreciation #161/365

*My frighteningly beautiful Vampire Queen daughter. *Sleeping in and then waking up and realizing I have an hour jump on the day! *Hanging out with new friends who are becoming dear friends. *Seeing all the creativity in costuming. *Watching my daughter's delight in having a spontaneously-planned sleep over with three of her friends after they all went Trick-or-Treating together. *Loving seeing the joy in my daughter's beautiful eyes. *Knowing that she is growing up and I am getting to watch every moment of it. *My brother's announcement that their adoption court date is in one month. -Feeling grateful, so very grateful, for my life.

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #160/365

*My FREEDOM! Never before in my life have I been SO grateful for my freedom. *Completions. Easeful completions. *Saying "no" and feeling my heart celebrate the declaration. *Running my life from a coffee shop. :) *Hand-written letters. It's such a lost art AND I LOVE IT! *"Get Happy" Rooibos tea. *Text messaging. *Wireless internet. -Feeling so happy to BE alive!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #160/365

*WOW! *Playing and playing and playing until the wee-er hours of the morning. Don't remember the last time I was up THAT late (early). *Laughing so hard, my abs hurt. *Finding humor and joy in the everyday things. *Playing games with a group of friends that requires 100% honesty and THAT is what makes it so fun. *"Upper Limit" games to discover how good the players can stand it and for how long. *Real fires in the fireplace. *Seeing the truest essence of all my friends emerge over a three-day stretch of time. -Loving who I am becoming and the life I am creating!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #158/365

*A stunningly breathtaking morning. *Performing my dance last night with the biggest smile, tears of joy in my eyes and the knowledge that the message of the song was absolutely true. *Feeling joy bubbling inside. *Learinging HUGE lessons with my business partner, Jen Halterman, as we spontaneously played in JenGie last night. *Discovering the importance of what I do and getting it on a cellular level. *People are able to locate me because of my commitment to being fully present with myself, therefore I'm having some of the most amazing, intimate conversations and connecting on a soul-to-soul level with people I have never connected with before. -Feeling SO grateful for the beautiful life I am creating.

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #157/365

*Gentle learnings. *Being in the mountains for the weekend. *The smell of french toast cooking in the kitchen of the Bed and Breakfast in which I am staying. *A cabin room all to myself and finding the joy in that, rather than focusing on being "alone". *Hugs and cuddles from friends. *Connecting with people in surprising ways. -Feeling grateful for my life!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #156/365

*MY BOOK HAS BEEN PUBLISHED!!!! To find more information about "Above the Clouds" visit: Earth Friendly Publishing. *Restful sleep. *A new day ahead... what magic will it bring? *My beautiful daughter. *Falling in love. Over and over again. With me! *The scents of autumn. *The sights of autumn. *The sounds of autumn. -Feeling SO grateful to BE ALIVE!

Grace in Small Things

Above the Clouds

My book is available for purchase now.

For more information, go here: www.earthfriendlypublishing.com/Above-the-Clouds.html

Wish List Item

So excited about this item... adding it to my wish list. Are you listening Santa? Livescribe Pen!!!