Appreciation #122/365

*Pandora radio. *A newfound old love of country music. *Jamba Juice for breakfast. *Homemade tacos for dinner. *Good movies that really make me think. Push was one of those movies. *Special effects. Harry Potter Half Blood Prince was totally full of them. *Appreciating that the new Harry is a character-driven movie, rather than relying on action. *Spending time with my daughter. *Hanging out with friends. *Laughing on the phone. -In love with my life!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #121/365

*Going to see Harry today. YAY! *So excited about my life and watching my Gifts unfold! *Experiencing the amazing miracles that flow through my hands. *Playing big and easefully. *Learning that life CAN be easeful. *Creating safety for myself by simply speaking the unarguable truth. *Sleeping instead of training at night. *Wondering that leads to surprisingly simple answers. *Friends who are willing to share their learnings with me. *Finally understanding that I CAN learn through other's experiences with out having to create my own same experience. Yay! Really happy about that one! -Loving my life!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #119 & 120/365

*Good music. *Laughing with friends. *Listening to good stories. *Watching myself and friends grow. *Talking to myself in the mirror and saying NICE things. *Making new friends. *Stretching my comfort zone. *Finding out that my body TRULY is a miracle! *Sunshine, clear skies and gentle winds. The perfect summer day. *Good food. *Computers. *Internet. *Central Air Conditioning. Thank the good Lord, especially for that!!! :) *Bare feet on grass covered with morning dew. *Driving fast with the windows down and the music loud. -Loving my life!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #118/365

*Rising before the sun did this morning and actually feeling great about it. *Getting all the photos ready to deliver to my client from last week. *Feeling excited about the week ahead, even though there's nothing exciting on my schedule. *Facing three more rounds of testing and doctor's visits this morning and feeling curious, rather than afraid. *Being grown up and still feeling young. *An entire day, yesterday, to do exactly what I wanted. *Using that time to be creative. -Grateful for my life.

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #117/365

*Watching "Overboard" and LMAO. This show, without fail, cracks me up every single time. "AAaaaaa! My body!" *A long day of easeful learning and integration. *Feeling grateful that my childhood was gentle and without abuse. *Learning that most of my drama was/is self-imposed. *A night of laughing with friends while lounging around their living room as we watched "Death at a Funeral". *Grateful that my name is NOT Tofutti Klein! LMAO *Remembering that *I* believe What I put out comes back to me. -Soooo grateful to be alive!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #116/365

*Gelato. *Good news from my doctor. *More to-do steps on the road to regaining myself. *Laughing. *Watching two of my adult friends behave with complete infatuation as though they are in high school. *Having another friend ask one of them, "How does it feel to be 16 again?" *Her response, "It's totally AWESOME!" *Watching two other adults behave like two year olds, picking on one another, me asking them why, exactly, they are doing that and having them be speechless. *A day ahead that is sure to be full of learning. *Still feeling SO proud of my work at the photoshoot. I got some AMAZING shots!!!! -Grateful to BE alive!

Grace in Small Things

Appreciation #115/365

*Witnessing a young boy when he thought no one was watching him and catching one of the most pure, joyful, magical moments. What Boys Do pt 1 and What Boys Do pt 2. *Learning new things. *Photoshop fun. *Tuna fish sandwiches on fresh bread. *Following my body's instructions. *Funny music. *Reruns of Reba. I have yet to watch an episode without a full-out belly laugh. *The prospect of dinner and a concert with my best friend tonight. -Loving my life.

Grace in Small Things

What Boys Do When They Think No One is Watching

Last night, I was in the kitchen making me some dinner. One thing I've gotta say about being not married... I really love following my impulses when it comes to creating meals - especially on the weeks my daughter is at her dad's and I have the house all to myself. Last night my dinner was a tuna fish sandwich on fresh bread and I thought I had gone to heaven!!!

Anyway... on with the story.

I was in the kitchen and, for some reason, I got prompted to look out the window above the sink. The little boy across the street was in the front yard alone. He was sitting in his beach chair, reflective sun glasses on and his baseball cap. I happened to look out just as an idea inspired him to jump out of the chair. I watched curiously and witnessed the most magical moments. I felt so happy I had followed the impulse to watch because it was something to cherish... so pure, so impulsive, so creative, so full of essence.

He took his ball cap off and and studied it for a bit. Then he put it on, turning it this way and that until, eventually, the bill was in back just like the rappers wear it. As far as I know, there was no music playing anywhere, which made the next couple minutes all the more wonderful because the music was in his heart...

Appreciation #114/365

*Knowing, the movie. *Knowing. *Co-creating the most magical afternoon. *Stunning myself with my own beautiful photography. *Nailing it on the very! first! shot! and everything that followed was simply icing on the cake! *Crying as I downloaded the pictures of my client and discovered that I had caught her essence. *Feeling so overflowing with love for myself. *Feeling closer to my Source as I expand in my essence. *Loving who I am becoming. -Grateful to be alive!!!

Grace in Small Things

Knowing

I watched Knowing last night and I'm still buzzing from the adventure. The creators of that movie did a damn fine job with building atmospheric tension! I was literally slumped down on the couch, hiding behind a throw cushion for most of the movie. Then, when it went entirely through the completion of the tale - of which I was surprised, because I thought they would end at the more gentler space, without showing all the details - my ears started ringing and my head started throbbing. I sat there wide-eyed and slack-jawed and oh so very curious. I felt moved and changed and excited and scared and blessed all at once.

I totally got the meaning behind the movie. I got the knowing. That happens for me a lot lately and I can tell when it's going to happen by how I react to the previews. I still haven't gone to see My Sister's Keeper for that very reason. Every time I saw the preview, I was sobbing uncontrollably by the end of it. I figured that two hours of that intense emotion is not something for which I am quite ready.

But, I'm totally off topic...

My father had wanted to see a different ending. I'm thinking he wanted to see the "happily and together eternally after" version, judging by his statements. His wife, while she got the ending, seemed to feel that it was relevent and made sense, she still thought the movie wasn't that great overall. She is not a fan of creepy movies and had no idea what she was getting herself into when she picked it up. She likes Nicholas Cage so, for her, it was a sure bet that seemingly turned sour.

I felt reverent after the movie ended and as though I had just witnessed some science fiction lover's version of what I learned while growing up in the Church. When they started delving into what the children were Knowing, I could not believe how well it followed what the Church teaches about the Last Days. I said as much to the room and my father agreed.

His wife was sitting to my right on the opposite end of the couch. I felt her energy bristle as she raised her hand to interject. She does that when my father won't stop talking and she wants to say something. I get it, but sometimes I put myself in her shoes and I feel frustrated. I imagine myself raising my hand to speak, as I did when I was in elementary school, and I feel myself wanting to scream. So, I'm not sure if the bristling came from wanting to scream or because she was offended by my statement.

"I'd like to point out that it's not the Church," she said, putting so much stress on the word Church that I turned to look at her, "that teaches that. It's Revelations in the Bible."

I was curious about what she was feeling in that moment. I experienced her as overly defensive of her Church, which is a common experience with her. If ever I question the Church on any level, she either physically leaves the room in an obviously disgusted manner or energetically takes herself elsewhere so she goes blind, deaf and dumb until the controversial conversation has ended. I believe it's because she has a lot of fear when people question the religion she loves as though, by their mere questioning of or disagreeing with the Church, somehow it makes it less true. Or, perhaps, it's because she fears that even hearing someone question the Church weakens her testimony. I have no idea and these are only my versions of her story.

"I understand that it's in the Bible," I said to the room. "I said 'the Church' because I was raised in 'the Church' and that's where I learned about Revelations."

I'm still thinking about the movie and its implications. I found myself wondering if I would hear the call when it came time and I'm wondering if I will trust myself to do whatever is asked of me. I know that there are a lot of people who would say, "It's just a dumb friggin' movie, Angie. And of the science fiction genre to boot!" Yeah. I know it is.

And, somehow, it seemed like so much more than just a movie.