Double Rainbows

"Today is a beautiful day. I go forward with an open heart into the expanse of universal abundance and welcome the flow of love and joy."

That was my Facebook status quote as I left my house for the day earlier this morning. I had no idea, really, what was in store then and could have never orchestrated the magic that was to follow.

It started when my mentor with whom I was doing professional trade today texted and said she NEEDED a latte and would be a few minutes late to her house where our appointment would be. "Good! I'll slow down then," I replied, laughing. I showed up at her house about 10 minutes later to find her car in the driveway. I knocked on her door. Long pause while I listened to the bees and the birds busily working away on this beautifully clear and hot day. The door opened and... before me stood a stranger whom I felt I should know but didn't recognize. Her face mirrored my feeling of disorientation. I had no idea Megan had gotten a new roommate. I've been out of the loop for a long time.

Julie invited me in. We sat down in the living room and began to get acquainted. As she talked, revealing her story to me as I asked leading questions, I realized why Megan was so late. I needed to get to know Julie. WOW!

Then Megan returned home and we chatted for another half hour, the three of us. When our "session" time officially started, it was noon - an hour passed our planned starting time. We went out onto the porch to start my session while sitting in the porch swing, gently rocking, laughing and processing. Behind us, a Robin Redbreast noisily thrashed through the ivy with a juicy fat worm dangling from her mouth. We watched her feed an equally fat bird of another breed, feeling surprised that the meal was not for her babies and Megan said, "Maybe they're mates."

All around us, the world was alive with life and creative energy. The fruit trees were heavy-laden with an eventual harvest. The flowering bushes were vibrant and the grass was lush. I shared with her that I feel so ready to step into who I am, while at the same time feeling scared to do so. The scared part of me is running the show and, especially, running my money. As I spoke, one of the lines that I said was, "The money must stop." I was floored by the indications as we explored what would happen if I owned that I felt that way... what would happen if the money did stop... what would my experience be?

My life has been a series of lessons to gain, I believe, an understanding of love and a complete compassion for humanity. Most of my lessons have been painful to an unbelievable degree. I've learned by living it and I realized in that moment as I sat there swaying with her that I'm ready to live compassionately for all of humanity - even the homeless - without actually fully experiencing that life.

I've been homeless and destitute in many ways. I'm actually, technically, homeless and destitute now - no place of my own, no belongings and no income. And in that awareness came the dawning knowledge that this state of destitute homelessness is the greatest disguise to hide behind. It is a cloak of invisibility. Homeless people are very difficult to locate because they have no address. I'm trying to hide. Enough.

I also uncovered my belief of struggle for all things financial. That I'm running my generational belief pattern that life must be hard and money must be scarce. I also revealed that I strongly feel my entire generation has worked itself into a financial hole from which it is going to be so difficult to recover and something has really got to change. I'm ready.

As we walked through the unwinding, unprogramming and reprogramming process, I felt my engines revving and my energy building. I had heat waves and energy coursing through me as I grew and expanded. The last thing I said in the process was, "I accept and love that I am now ready and willing to break the rules in outrageous and new ways," which set into motion the final unwinding of my belief that I had to be good and follow all the rules all the time and that, if I'm going to "be bad" and "break the rules" (read: follow my curiosity) then I needed to do it behind closed doors, in the dark and where no one could see me.

I released my belief that succeeding and having financial abundance was "bad". I released my beliefs that I had to hide to "be bad" and I released myself from carrying any further the load of my generational beliefs of struggle. I released myself from poverty. I released myself from homelessness. I released myself from invisibility. And I claimed my power.

And then... the HUGEST bumblebee came out of nowhere and flew straight toward me, its energy and intention hitting me squarely in the heart chakra like an arrow. It hovered for a few moments 12 inches in front of me. Just long enough for me to be absolutely certain that it was there then it buzzed off and disappeared.

Bumblees are not meant to fly. Science cannot explain why they do. Their wings are too small for the size of their body. The body is too big and not aerodynamic enough to fly. And, yet, they fly.

None of that escaped me in that moment.

From there I travelled to a friend's house for dinner and a movie. Several people whom I love dearly were also there and the room abounded with love and appreciation. We watched Invictus and in that movie, I heard a quote from Nelson Mandela that sprung me the rest of the way open into full transformation: "If I cannot change when circumstances demand it, how can I expect it of others?"

Love and joy, gratitude and abundance, flow and peace surrounded me today in such massive amounts, there was no way I could ignore it. And I created this!

The drive home brought another awareness and shift in my openness when I looked at a picture I'd recieved of my daughter and her stepmom. It was a joyful, loving picture and the last remaining vestiges of struggle with what WAS released and I soared on wings of freedom from bondage. As I got ready to turn in for the night, I spoke with my mom while feeling so full of love and gratitude. I was overflowing... I had no hope for stopping the tears. Such love! Such joy! Such fullness!

And then, there in the middle of all that joy and love and fullness, the heavens roared and flashed, the skies opened up, the rain fell and a double rainbow danced across the sky - at first crossed at the lower part, something I've never seen before. There, at the end of my magical day was that beautiful reminder that He will never forsake me.

Life IS good!

Further Update

I'm appreciating my new sense of open space and all of the discoveries that have happened for me since Thursday night!!!

FURTHER UPDATE

Since I have infused myself with big love and embraced a new experience regarding open space, I've had innumerous inspirations that I feel really excited about. Even more exciting, I've taken the first step on all the inspirations that I could!

Yesterday, I filled out my application for SLCC. I'M GOING BACK TO SCHOOL! I'm excited to be finally pursuing my dream to be a teacher and I am going for a joint degree in education and social work.

Yesterday, I discovered a LOCAL publisher who is perfect for the book I've been working on. I've written my query letter and will be submitting my manuscript today.

MY REQUEST

I'd love to enroll you in my exciting adventure. I believe focusing the energy of a large number of people creates an amazing vortex of success when it's put toward a focused intent. When you think of me, see me successfully completing school, send love and see me signing the contract with the publisher. Hold space for 17 seconds focused on loving me and seeing me as successful in these two adventures. And, for those who know me personally, I'd love to receive support and loving energy through emails or texts.

YAY! Thank you!

Let it Rock!

The night was every description of perfect. Amazing weather. Beautiful people. Energy that was soothing AND energizing at the same time. People showed up in droves and stayed most of the night. Everywhere I turned, there was the face of someone I loved. People loved my art and went home with their favorite piece - or pieces. It was an astounding experience.

This morning, as I prepare this update for you, I feel a curious mixture of heavy, unmovable and alert. I am experiencing myself today with the sensation of being full of cement, my body being reluctant to bend and sway. After the exhilaration of last week which showed up as the inability to sleep for several nights, I imagine that is the biggest reason why I am feeling the effect of gravity with monumental intensity.

I feel so blessed to have created this breathtaking experience for myself and those who chose in to experiencing it with me. I had people show up that were friends of friends, that I had never met before. I had blogging friends show up (Hi, Lynn!) that I had no idea would be in attendance and felt so excited to meet. I had many of my ALC buddies there and they stayed for the bulk of the night, adding laughter and connection to the event. My local, immediate family members were all there. And, how cool is this???! Three different people I knew from high school and haven't seen since, showed up simply because they had seen my information on facebook and felt excited to support me! Two of my beautiful friends (Hi, Liz and Nichol!) showed up first thing and stayed all the way through, offering me a home base where I could touch down and regroup every now and then. My former husband, his wife and his architectural designer friends came and, a little later, one of his employee's and his wife and step daughter did too. My lifetimes-long soul connection (Love you!) also offered his presence and strength, warming my heart and holding me up with his smile.

By the end of the night, my emotions were running so full, I was overflowing. There were no words. I could only cry. The love and the appreciations bubbled out of me in tears as people hugged me good night. I felt kerfuffled and, yet, peaceful. It was the most complete I have felt in a long while and I created it all! The feedback I received from practically everyone was, "You are radiating love and glowing. You are absolutely beautiful."

My mentors, Megan and Annabeth, as they were leaving both hugged me close. I could feel their appreciation and, knowing how much they have witnessed of my journey, I knew they could feel what I was experiencing. Annabeth could only say over and over, "This is SO big! I'm so proud of you! I love you!"

Megan stood in front of me and asked, "How do you feel?"

There were no words, however. So I showed her. She gets my body-movement language and I showed her what I was feeling as tears ran down my face. She smiled and said, "Draw that, Ang! Create that image. That is your million dollar piece of art!"

Indeed it is! Talk about a night of continual chivels!!!

I've said it before and I'm gonna say it again now... LIFE IS GOOD!

At Home

I am at home in my skin today. As of late, I feel like I am alive for the first time in almost two decades. I have my arms open to embrace life and breathe in the miracles all around me. I am abundance and I am space.

I find it incredibly amazing that I finally get this "creating my life" thing. I heard about it for almost ten years before it clicked. And then, seemingly one day, it just did. I know that it wasn't in just one day. I have worked and prayed and played and sweated and pleaded for something to change. I have paid my dues time and again. And while I would love to say it has been easy, it hasn't been. Until it was.

Now it is.

I love me! WOW!

TT - Sighing Into Space

All the world IS a stage and I am sighing into the space of joy and beauty I have manifested. I created the most perfect, beautiful day yesterday. And, this morning, I woke up feeling expansive and grateful and abundant. I love that I have kept at this thing of learning and growing. I love that, when I have fallen off the stage, I have gotten back up and have kept on dancing. I love that I am beginning to "get" it all. I love that I am alone and I am good with that. I love that I am strong and creative and magical. And, most of all... I love that I love myself. This is one gloriously amazing theatrical production I have created - full of music, colors, lights and heat. BRAVA!

Lyrical

My life feels like a poem
Lyrical
Flowing
Graceful
My life feels like an adventure
Exciting
Breathy
Fun
My life is as I create it
Magical
Wonderful
Blessed
My life is mine and I am living it
Gratefully
Peacefully
Abundantly
My life
My life
My life
THIS IS MY LIFE

The Long Rest

Saturday was an incredible gift to myself.

A few months ago, a new client walked into my life and she has forever changed me. I love it when that happens! She (Hi, Liz!) opened my eyes to the huge possibilities of who I am. I had been dreaming small and hoping for greatness, yet having no idea what that looked like or how to go about it. My imagination was so limited on what I could come up with, mostly because I tend to be an "Either/Or" sort of gal and have difficulties finding the "AND" space.

She emailed me a few months ago and said, "Angie, have you ever heard of psychic parties? I am wondering if we could do that, only with Reiki?"

I about fell off my chair as chivels washed over me. A Reiki Party?!?! Who would've thought?! Well, Liz would've thought, that's who. I had been asking the Universe, "How can I grow my business, share what I do AND have fun?" The Universe delivered Liz.

Saturday was the premier of the Reiki Parties. As I prepared the space on Friday, I worried that the women would get bored while they were waiting for their session. I was worried that I would not be able to provide a juicy enough session in the fifteen minutes per person limit. I was worried that no one would show. I was worried they would want to leave as soon as they were done.

All of it was for naught.

The women stayed for over four hours. We had an excellent showing. There was a lot of laughter and tears. The women supported one another and shared with one another their experiences from their mini-sessions. They said they would do it again and would recommend it to their friends. I got great feedback on the experience.

My first Reiki party was a HUGE success. I attribute part of that success to my hostess, Liz. She was gracious and beautiful, peaceful and informative, loving and loveable. I wouldn't have ever thought of this without her and am grateful that the first experience was so amazing.

I feel successful, peaceful and abundant today. I feel like I am on top of the world and feel excited to have the opportunity to share who I am, what I know and how I feel with the world. I am grateful I am sharing in a way that is bringing love and peace to those around me so that they can spread that to the people they know. My touch is creating ripples of wonderfulness and I feel so blessed to be in the center of that!

WOW! It's a beautiful day!

Oprah & Me

One of my regular readers is my father's wife. This morning, as I was getting ready for the day, she was in sitting at her computer, quietly doing her thing.

"Did you know you are linked to Oprah?" She asked me. The name of the multi-millionairess rang through my head, echoing and rolling delightfully.

Oprah. Oprah. Oprah.

"What?"

"Yeah," she said matter-of-factly, "You are linked to Oprah."

I walked into the den and said, "What does that mean?"

"I followed one of the links on your website. The link that says 'New Awakening Videos' and look!"

I stared at the screen, disbelieving my eyes. Sure enough. There she was. My hero... er... heroine.

I was startled to feel a lump growing in my throat as I stared at her beautiful face. I am linked to Oprah.

Now I realize that there are probably a gazillion websites with this very same ad on their pages and that, just because it's there on mine doesn't mean I am special. However, what I totally got in that moment is that I am in the same energy vibration so that I am ABLE to be linked to Oprah!!!

This is HUGE, for me. The metaphysical implications astound me and I feel so excited when I say, "I am linked with Oprah!!!"

WOW!

I am linked with Oprah.

Amazing

I feel humbled...

I just facilitated an Awakening Session wherein my instructions were: Angie, you are to be silent. You will not say anything.

Of course, I wigged out and thought back to the voice: But if I am silent, how will my client know they are getting their money's worth?

The answer was: You are to be silent. Be present to channel the information and love through you. What comes through you is for your client's eyes, ears and soul only. You will receive no other guidance than this: Be silent.

I felt afraid. I am usually very interactive with my clients, so this was new to me. Just before I laid my hands on her, I had the thought: I really wonder if I should change my prices to just say "Awakening Sessions" $100 instead of price break downs for minutes which I never adhere to anyway...

The session was beautifully peaceful, loving and tender. I felt so honored to be in the midst of such a sacred occurence. At the end, as tears flowed down her face, I told her what I had been instructed. She smiled and understood completely, saying, "It was exactly what I needed! Thank you!"

As she walked out of my office, she handed me a check. It was for forty dollars more than it should be. I stumbled over my words, trying to tell her it wasn't the right amount, that she had paid too much. Her answer: I was instructed to pay you $100.00.

Humbled, indeed...

Feet up

Today is a day where I would like to lean back, kick up my feet, eat chocolates and, perhaps, watch a marathon of weepy-girl movies or feel-good Christmas flicks. Today is a day where I could be doing that because there is nothing to do here at work, yet I am here... making a show of it and watching the fog roll by my window.

Today is a day where I am thinking about all I am blessed with...

I am blessed with a job that allows me to sit here and watch the fog roll by, although I would rather be cuddled under a blanket at home with some hot chocolate and a DVD.

I am blessed with a beautiful daughter who grows more beautiful every day from the inside out, who is healthy and witty and a bright light in each person's path she crosses.

I am blessed with a close immediate family that is healthy and generally happy and with whom I love spending time.

I am blessed with improving health and a body that keeps on ticking no matter how I abuse or neglect it.

I am blessed with a safe, sheltered place to lay my head, food to eat and clothing to keep me warm.

I am blessed with a few good friends - some of which have been with me for decades, some of which are brand new additions to my life.

I am blessed with the ability to heal myself and others, to see through the eyes of God and to find the divine within us all.

I am blessed with the Gift of Words...

Which reminds me... several times within the last two weeks I have come across written feedback from others - some even strangers - as well as receiving the feedback live and in person. All of the feedback says... when will you be published?!!! You need to be out there! NOW!

I am so blessed. So very, very blessed.

You Needed Me

I often think about that... you needed me. I look back on my life and see those whom I have thought loved me deeply and seemed to need me. Back then.

What does it mean to "need" someone? Is that a good thing? Do I really want to be needed?

Going on ten years now that I have been divorced and there has been no significant romantic relationships during that time. No one has needed me during that time. Oh, granted, my daughter has needed me day in and day out. But there has been no man that has needed me.

Need... need... need... what does that mean? I looked it up on http://www.dictionary.com/ and discovered...

need –noun

1.	a requirement, necessary duty, or obligation: There is no need for you to go there.

2.	a lack of something wanted or deemed necessary: to fulfill the needs of the assignment.

3.	urgent want, as of something requisite: He has no need of your charity.

4.	necessity arising from the circumstances of a situation or case: There is no need to worry.

5.	a situation or time of difficulty; exigency: to help a friend in need; to be a friend in need.

6.	a condition marked by the lack of something requisite: the need for leadership.

7.	destitution; extreme poverty: The family's need is acute.

–verb (used with object)

8.	to have need of; require: to need money.

–verb (used without object)

9.	to be under an obligation (used as an auxiliary, typically in an interrogative or in a negative statement, and fol. by infinitive, in certain cases without to; in the 3d pers. sing. the form is need, not needs): He need not go.

10.	to be in need or want.

11.	to be necessary: There needs no apology.

—Idiom

12.	if need be, should the necessity arise: If need be, I can type the letters myself.

[Origin: bef. 900; (n.) ME nede, OE néd (WSaxon nīed), c. G Not, ON nauth, Goth nauths; (v.) ME neden, OE néodian, deriv. of the n.]

—Related forms

needer, noun

—Synonyms 2, 3. See lack. 3. requirement. 4. Need, necessity imply a want, a lack, or a demand, which must be filled. Need, a word of Old English origin, has connotations that make it strong in emotional appeal: the need to be appreciated. Necessity, a word of Latin origin, is more formal and impersonal or objective; though much stronger than need in expressing urgency or imperative demand, it is less effective in appealing to the emotions: Water is a necessity for living things. 5. emergency. 7. neediness, indigence, penury, privation. See poverty. 8. want, lack.
—Antonyms 7. wealth.

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

Hmmmmmmm.... after reading that, I have discovered that "need" is not a nice thing. It sounds icky and mostly like it will never be fulfilled...

Perhaps, after all, it is a blessing that you didn't need me...

Storm

The intensity of the atmosphere caught my attention. It sounded loud and reckless outside and I felt inquisitively drawn toward the window. I wondered what was happening to make such a ruckus and what sight would greet me.

Since I was in the process of getting ready, I was in a state of complete undress. Propriety dictated that I merely peek out through the slats in my blinds, rather than throw them open as I wanted to do. The limited view only served to pique my curiosity. A storm was brewing. I felt excited.

One of my most favorite things about living in Utah is the violent autumn storms we get here. Usually they start in August and, apparently, some areas of the state have been pelted mercilessly. However, where I live, it has been noticeably dry and calm. I have been aware that I have missed the storms – the crocodile tear raindrops that splat in tablespoon-full drops with a force that leaves a sting; the thunder that rolls forever across the sky and lightning that strikes so near, I am left with a purple phantom image in my vision and my hair standing on end.

Grabbing whatever nearby articles of clothing and ending up sorely mismatched, I yanked the cord to the blinds. They zipped up with stunning agility and just the slightest wisp of frictional smoke, leaving my second-floor east-facing bedroom window wide open.

The sky was so heavy, it was black in the east and the wind was so fierce the atmosphere was laden with dust, casting the world in a misty haze. The thundering I had heard was not thunder but was, instead, the sound of the twenty-year-old trees in my complex fighting for their right to stand. The winds tore through them with unrelenting fury, violently breaking free anything weak or frail. Entire branches were sailing and swirling through the air, an accolade to Dorothy’s house. Garbage cans were lurching and letting loose their debris. Car alarms were going off everywhere in protest of the onslaught.

For a brief moment, I stood with my nose pressed to the glass, drinking in the sight. Then sense took over as one branch from the nearby large tree thudded into and then scratched eerily across my window panes. That was enough warning to back up just a few steps. The tree outside my window bowed reluctantly to the south-easterly bluster, its branches kissing the roof of the nearest car. The trunk near the ground is a good four feet in circumference and I could see it straining to hold its spot in the earth. The limbs shook and bent erratically, tossing out any loose twigs. As the winds battered all the trees, they bent and shook and swayed with the struggle and, still, remained standing.

As I stood there, watching the violence of nature, I felt chills coursing over my body. The hairs on the back of my neck and on my arms were standing on end. I could feel the energy that I use in my healing sessions pounding through the atmosphere mirrored in the strength of it in the storm. I was momentarily stunned that I have mastered the ability to harness the strength of the Universe and channel it for myself and others. I breathed deep when I realized how profoundly grateful I feel. I have chosen to step into who I really am and to honor that. With the energy of who I am and what I do so vividly displayed for me by the Universe, I felt awe. I also realized that sometimes being me feels as vast and as fierce as the storm I was witnessing.

I wanted more. I wanted to stand out in the courtyard feeling that wind bending me as I dance with it and it whips my hair into a frenzy about my head. Being that I had rollers in my hair and had only fifteen minutes to get ready, I acquiesced to the yearning to be outside, but limited myself to standing on my porch where the wind could buffet my body, but my hair remained fairly contained.

I opened the door, every sense assailed at the exact same moment. The air was loud; a chaotic myriad of sounds, one on top of the other – creaking limbs, struggling leaves, groaning trunks, thudding garbage cans, frantic wind chimes clanging in a non-melodious song, squonking car alarms, screeching branches against windows, flags billowing and snapping. The sight was stunningly alive and gray at the same time; objects seemed to shimmer with the intensity of the energy coursing through every possible space. The smell of decomposing brine mingled with every air molecule, as the storm swept in over the Great Salt Lake in the West. It filled my nose with acrid, salty tang and caused me to grimace and gag.

And then the rain, thunder and lightning began, shaking the earth with the insistent pounding. Gigantic drops were flying horizontally to crash into whatever surface they met. Thunder and lightning was crashing with predictable regularity. And I stood there. Face to the sky and hands held open, feeling the power course through me and the Universe around me. I was One with everything.

Five hours later, it is still raining. The thunder is a soft roll, the lightning is muted and the raindrops pelt the ground in waves of gentleness, followed by spurts of fury. I am imagining that, outside my bedroom window, there is a fairy wonderland and the sound I hear is a majestic waterfall. I stand at the bottom of the waterfall and the water washes me free of all my worries.

All that is left is the peace in knowing that I am One with Everything.

Overflowing

Some days I surprise myself.

Like this morning, for instance...

I feel joy to overflowing on a regular basis now. And that is a very new experience for me. I had heard it was possible and, for a long time, believed it to be for everyone but me. Thing is, though, it - this overflowing joy feeling - is for everyone simply for the asking. And then, the receiving. My hang up was the receiving part. I asked and asked, but then did not sit still long enough to receive.

And now, as I hold this joy, I am humbled and inspired and feel so deeply blessed. Deeply enough that, as I looked at the clouds this morning that were swollen with much needed moisture and I heard the birds singing, I felt tears in my eyes. Tears of absolute joy.

I am filled to overflowing.

Grace

Grace

grace /greɪs/ noun, verb, graced, grac·ing.
–noun
1. elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action.
2. a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment.
3. favor or good will.
4. a manifestation of favor, esp. by a superior: It was only through the dean's grace that I wasn't expelled from school.
5. mercy; clemency; pardon: an act of grace.
6. favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity.
7. an allowance of time after a debt or bill has become payable granted to the debtor before suit can be brought against him or her or a penalty applied: The life insurance premium is due today, but we have 31 days' grace before the policy lapses.
8. Theology.
a. the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God.
b. the influence or spirit of God operating in humans to regenerate or strengthen them.
c. a virtue or excellence of divine origin: the Christian graces.
d. Also called state of grace. the condition of being in God's favor or one of the elect.
9. moral strength: the grace to perform a duty.
10. a short prayer before or after a meal, in which a blessing is asked and thanks are given.
11. (usually initial capital letter) a formal title used in addressing or mentioning a duke, duchess, or archbishop, and formerly also a sovereign (usually prec. by your, his, etc.).
12. Graces, Classical Mythology. the goddesses of beauty, daughters of Zeus and Eurynome, worshiped in Greece as the Charities and in Rome as the Gratiae.
13. Music. grace note.

–verb (used with object)
14. to lend or add grace to; adorn: Many fine paintings graced the rooms of the house.
15. to favor or honor: to grace an occasion with one's presence.

—Idioms
16. fall from grace,
a. Theology. to relapse into sin or disfavor.
b. to lose favor; be discredited: He fell from grace when the boss found out he had lied.
17. have the grace to, to be so kind as to: Would you have the grace to help, please?
18. in someone's good (or bad) graces, regarded with favor (or disfavor) by someone: It is a wonder that I have managed to stay in her good graces this long.
19. with bad grace, reluctantly; grudgingly: He apologized, but did so with bad grace.
20. with good grace, willingly; ungrudgingly: She took on the extra work with good grace.

I have been thinking a lot about grace today. When I looked up the word, I had no idea there would be so much information on it. The definitions I feel in alignment with today are 1-3:
elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action; a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment; favor or good will

I feel full of grace today. I feel beautiful in manner and form. I feel graceful in motion. I feel blessed with attractive qualities and endowed with pleasing abilities. I feel grateful to have found favor with the Universe and to be visited with such good will. Mostly, though, I feel graceful in my Self.

I am creating abundance and it is showing up. With immense and unlimited Grace.

Mantis

A few days ago, for some reason, I had the image of a praying mantis pop into my head. I don’t know why it was there, I only remember wondering about how long it had been since I had seen one and when would I see another. I am very curious about those creatures.

Last night, as I left for Life Skills, I got in the car, drove out of my parking space and began to leave the parking lot. As I did so, I remembered that I did not have my schedule with me. I am committed to having that with me at all times for obvious reasons that were eluding me for longer than I want to admit to you. Because of that commitment, and although it would possibly make me late – which, it didn’t... interesting – I turned around, parked, turned off the car, and ran up the stairs.

There, as I ran up the stairs, I noticed an odd object affixed to the side of my porch light. I paused and stared. What’s this? Yes. It was a Praying Mantis! I felt happy that he was there and was so curious about his appearance and what it possibly symbolized for me. I shared my discovery with my daughter who begged to go see it, even after I had started the car and backed out. Fearing tardiness, I said “no” and stated I was certain he would still be there when we got home. Her face fell and I realized that one more minute would not make or break me and allowed her to jump out to see it.

When we arrived home, Mr. Mantis was still there. I was so excited to see him and ran inside to pull out my Native American animal totem book, “Animal Speak” by Ted Andrews. I read about the Mantis and was delighted to discover the correlation to tonight: Mantis is the Power of Stillness... It spoke of the link between martial arts and the Mantis and I have been yearning to begin training in martial arts. It stated... Through learning to still the outer mind and go within, we can draw upon greater power... Mantis teaches how to still the outer so that when it is time to act (in any form) it is done with surety, accuracy, and great power... dictionary states mantis comes from Greek word meaning “Prophet...” We can learn to use the stillness in varying degrees – whether for creativity or healing – and this is part of what Mantis teaches.

Then this part jumped out at me: Are you being impatient? Are you needing help meditating and quieting the outer mind? Are you missing opportunities to grasp life’s rewards because you act or speak to hastily?

And then I understood... I am forgetting the EASY part! I am doing all the “work” and the “play” and the “action.” I am forgetting to REST! I am forgetting to be STILL and OPEN TO RECEIVING and therefore the money has no place to land.

WOW!

Last night I went out and thanked Mr. Mantis – who was still sitting there, patiently waiting – for the gentle reminder to be still. Then I intentionally rested for receiving money abundantly. This morning, Mr. Mantis was still there and it was a most amazing way to start off my day!