Suddenly, last Monday, 6/23/08, I drove past the house and there were men on the roof. They were ripping off the three layers of roofing to get ready for the new, modern, up-to-code roof. I felt excited. So did the house.
As the week progressed, the roof got more bare until, by Thursday, the original timbers were visible.
The wood is old and dry, fragile and brittle in some areas. In some places, the 2x4s were corroded and some were completely gone. I climbed the ladder to be able to see the entire roof and attic area. Incredible!
By the end of work yesterday, the roof was completely sheeted and ready for the new shingles. They have removed the extra chimney that is no longer of use and have shored up the rafters.
They have reframed the areas that were weak and missing and the house has a new top.
I feel excited to see work being done. I feel hopeful and scared, all at once, that my own place is coming together. Soon I will be at the final decision-making point wherein I have to stand firm on whether I am purchasing it or not. Right now, I get to do all the fun parts... picking shingles and gutters, choosing paint colors and cabinetry, deciding on bathtubs and doors. That part is fun. And it will be beautiful when it is complete. A place I can really call Home.
I am scared of when the time comes to sign on the line. Then I am fully responsible for the upkeep of this place and the payment of the mortgage. I feel scared when I look at the 30 years of being responsible for a high mortgage payment month in, month out. And, I feel excited and have a sense of liberation.
I CAN do this. I CAN have my own place. I CAN pay the mortgage monthly and easefully. I CAN!