Visitation

I have loved him since we were ten. He died almost four years ago, yet he visited me last night. Ironically, he called himself by the name I use for him in my autobiography. He took me by the hand and I could feel the warmth of him. When I do my work and the spirits join me, I can feel them, but they feel cold. I was confused by the heat in the room, warm enough that, on this cold autumn night with the window opened, I threw off the blankets and settled into the sauna of his presence.

He said, "I love you." His eyes glittered with unshed tears. I felt them burning in my own eyes as well and I breathed deeply. I have been missing him so much lately and then, there he was. It's his birthday Monday. I miss hearing his voice.

He continued and I soaked in the sound of his words, the warmth of him and felt like melting into the chocolate of his eyes, "I love you. I always have. I always will. I'm loving you from this side now."

I opened my eyes for a brief moment to see if he was really there. I could feel his touch on me and the room was full of glimmering light, but I couldn't see him. I longed to see him and closed my eyes again. He was still there. And I melted into him, missing him beyond this world.

And I slid into sleep with this song playing in my heart and mind...