Hormonal

I slid into the parking space aware that my breath was lodged in my throat, caught on something that was a strange mixture of a gasp and a moan. They were beautiful. There before me were three men in their work uniforms of jeans, boots and navy blue tees. Each of them were wearing mirrored sunglasses. None of them were exceedingly buff or model-gorgeous, but the combination of the three filled my senses to overflowing.

One was leaning casually against the wall, his right foot propped up high along the brick while he drank his Red Bull. Another was leaning against the ice machine in much the same stance, guzzling a bottled frappucino. The third was standing firmly with a strong, wide stance, reading the morning news. They were men being men, without the chaos or confusion that women can throw into the mix and I thrilled at the sight of them.

There is something so magical about men together. They have an innate camaraderie that is ever-present. Their sense of unspoken competition is seemingly about who can dead-lift the most weight and remain standing, rather than the emotional back-lash and eye-gouging that women resort to. I watched them for as long as I could before it would become obvious that I was. They were seemingly oblivious to my presence, only focused on being themselves, relaxing prior to a day on the job.

I loved the moment of being witness to sheer being-ness that I was witnessing. I felt my hormones race through me, awakening me to the presence of a male. While I say that I am curious about a same-sex relationship, I am fairly certain that I am solidly heterosexual. Watching these men this morning and feeling my systems race to meet them was further proof of the latter.

I appreciate men for the amazing creatures they are. I appreciate that our society has pushed them into a corner, taken away their divine right to feel and, yet, still expect them to be strong. I appreciate that, for the most part, our men are able to pull it off and look forward to the day when everyone realizes that emotional AND strong are a viable possibility and a much healthier way to live.