Moving...

So... I've been blogging here as Touch of the Phoenix on blogspot for several years. I'm realizing that I'm spread all across the web... scattered in little pieces here and there. Websites and numerous blogs. Facebook. Twitter. MySpace. LinkedIn. Bebo. Everywhere. So many sites and links and such to keep up with that I am not doing a very good job.

Thus and therefore...

I'm condensing and simplifying. I'm moving over to WordPress.

Oh stop your whining.

WordPress is a much friendlier platform for website blogging. That's all. :)

So... to continue following my witty-ness, go here... angiekmillgate.wordpress.com/blog/

Looking forward to playing with you again!

In Gratitude

Truly, I have SO MUCH to be grateful for and my tears are overflowing with the abundance of love that is coursing through me. I've been so blessed over this year - the most difficult one of my life to date. I've learned so much about me, found so much magic and have grown nearer to the woman I was meant to be here on earth. I've found more stones for my footpath and have finally began recognizing the Divine within me.

I feel powerfully moved by the message of this song and the images in this following video. Thank you, Rascal Flatts, for putting my feelings into words and singing it for the world to hear. And, especially, thank you for allowing me to embed this powerful message into my blog.

But, mostly, thank you, God, for being there for me. Always.

Feedback Requested

I have created a preview profile for Above the Clouds and I would appreciate you taking a few moments to read through the first couple chapters, rate it and leave a message.

createspace.com

Thank you for your interest and support. What an adventure this is!!!

PRESS RELEASE!

PRESS RELEASE November 06, 2010

For Immediate Release Contact: Angie Millgate Moments of Awakening angiekmillgate@hotmail.com

Above the Clouds A Courageous Journey of Hope, Love and Revelation

SALT LAKE CITY, UT - November 6, 2010 - Announcing the release of Above the Clouds - A Courageous Journey of Hope, Love and Revelation by Angie K. Millgate This book is the first in a series about healing and rediscovering wholeness in a life once fractured seemingly beyond repair. This creative non-fiction work provides a candid look into the author's life with explicit detail and gut-wrenching honesty. Publication Date: Oct 22 2010 ISBN/EAN13: 1452803889 / 9781452803883 Page Count: 276 Related Categories: Body, Mind & Spirit / Inspiration & Personal Growth Website: abovetheclouds.webstarts.com Purchase: https://www.createspace.com/3446382 Above the Clouds A Courageous Journey of Hope, Love and Revelation Authored by Angie K. Millgate Cover design or artwork by Angie K. Millgate Above the Clouds - A Journey of Courage, Hope and Revelation is an autobiographical account of growing up in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, landing in a marriage riddled with domestic violence and the author's gut-wrenching journey to leave both worlds. With humor, explicit detail and blunt honesty, she provides intimate details regarding her sexual awakening, the terror of living with domestic violence and the race to survive. She also addresses her sheltered life as a Mormon, her eventual departure from that religion and the undeniable power of the human spirit. For the first three decades of her life, the author searched for love and truth in all the wrong places - everywhere but within - leaving her continually dissatisfied and, eventually, horribly abused. She had no idea what self-love meant because she believed love happened from outside her. She had no idea what true emotion was and she had no idea how to live unless there was someone there telling her who she was, what she liked and which way she should go and when. After an experience of domestic violence that nearly resulted in her death, which is shared in Above the Clouds with terrifying clarity, she decided it was time to know herself. Her first step was to take responsibility for her life, realizing she needed to stop blaming everyone for where she was. She also realized her relationship with herself greatly influenced her relationship with others. By taking small, certain steps, the progress was slow but has become longstanding. Above the Clouds offers ideas on how to go about creating change for a healthier, safer life, while discovering and embracing who you are at the core. Anyone, if they are willing to look at themselves, can experience the same healing, safety and audacity in their life.

About the author: Angie K. Millgate has a dream of bettering this world one person at a time, starting with herself and then, branching outward. She has been a single mother since 1998 and her daughter is one of the biggest joys in her life. When her daughter was born in 1997, Angie knew her life would change drastically. Being a mother has been a huge blessing, but being a single mother is the hardest thing she has ever done. The world is not kind to those who are alone and that is the reason her intention is to hold space for wholeness for everyone in this world - no matter race, religion, sexual preference or marital status. "It seems that humanity has forgotten its humanity," Angie says, "And how to treat one another with love and kindness. I pray that I will be able to do that for those who cross my path. I want to live a life well-lived. And I hope that, when I am gone, I will leave a Legacy of Love for everyone." Above the Clouds - A Courageous Journey of Hope, Love and Revelation is Angie's first published book. Since 2002, she has published a free weekly Meditation that goes out via email around the world and has touched the hearts of thousands. She is a teacher, photographer, artist, speaker and a gifted Reiki Master Teacher and Wholeness Coach whose presence holds space for others wherein they can find their lost parts. Angie helps people Remember themselves. Every endeavor she undertakes is imbued with her passion for life and the essence of Love. For more information about her life, you can visit her website at angiekmillgate.webstarts.com

Swirling

I thought I was understanding everything everyone was saying in the courtroom. They were all speaking English and using words I understood. So, I should have been able to understand. But I didn’t. All I knew was I was crying. Sobbing really. I couldn’t breathe.

And I didn’t know why.

As soon as Judge Reese said, “There is nothing that I can do except what society expects of me,” I knew where we were heading and my brain stopped being able to absorb the information or translate the sounds into meaningful words. It was just a swirling, garbled mess of groans and moans.

Or maybe that was me.

My best friend is going away for life. I’ve watched him transform right before my eyes into this man that I’ve always been able to see beneath the surface of his façade and this morning, I heard the sentence that condemned him to live behind bars for his entire life.

I cannot compute.

I imagine that, when my brain comes back online, or when my heart starts beating again, or when I start breathing again, or when I am able to string together intelligible thoughts again, I will have more to say. But now… right now… all I have are sobs that are wrenching up from the root of me and crashing out into the universe.

A long, mournful wail. It’s all I’ve got.

Song for Today

Appreciation 10/24/10

*Still feels like Christmas to me. It has since midnight, Thursday night, when I found out my book was in print and available to purchase! *It's cloudy and rainy and cold today and I LOVE IT! *The Brown-Eyed Susans are nodding at me and I feel happy that their brilliant yellow petals contrast with the grayness of the day. *Everything, it seems, is coming to easeful resolve in my life. That which was once bothering me has dissolved. Nice! *Being willing to look for the REAL reason I was bothered with my best friend, uncovering it, acknowledging it, revealing it and healing it. *Knowing that all things change. *Learning how to love fully AND be detached at the same time. *Stepping up and into the woman I'm meant to be. ~ Dang! I sure am loving my life!

Above the Clouds

My book, Above the Clouds - A Courageous Journey of Hope, Love and Revelation is

NOW AVAILABLE IN PRINT!

WOW! This is a dream come true and has been such a journey. I'd love for you to share in my adventure and you can do so by following this link: https://www.createspace.com/3446382

After you've read the book, drop me an email with your feedback, questions and emotions.

YAY! AND THERE IS MUCH REJOICING!!!

Freedom...

A quote I discovered on one of the discussion boards for my HIST 1700 class... It's a keeper...

"free speech must be kept free even in wartime, even when passions are high, because that is when the people need to hear both sides of the argument, not just what the government wishes to tell them.” (Zechariah Chafee, Jr.,)

Appreciations for 09/02/10

*The quiet of this classroom... I am the first one here... 45 minutes early. It's calm. It's cool. It's peaceful. NICE! *Laughing at the absurdity of paying TWENTY dollars for a "textbook" for one of my classes. The "textbook" is a stack of papers, about 150 pages high, that is a collection of copied excerpts from email, internet searches, etc. Really?!!! *Watching my favorite show with my best friend until late in the night (or early in the morning, depending who you ask) and sharing our opinions about it. *An afternoon gathering with women yesterday that ended up being fulfilling and informational. *Remembering old memories, suddenly, and feeling curious. ~ I am grateful for my life!

Appreciations for 09/01/10

*I awoke this morning to find that my life has, indeed, become so magical that it is now second nature. *Driving my daughter to school this morning, I heard my three favorite songs played on the radio and rejoiced in the messages therein. *A day ahead of collaboration and laughter. *Knowing I am in the right place at the right time. *Did a "Resonance Repatterning" session yesterday that simply, beautifully transformed my life in an instant. *The soothing feeling of knowing that all is exactly as it should be. *Living in the here and now and realizing that the here and now is an immense gift with which I've been divinely blessed and feel a depth of gratitude that grows deeper with each passing moment. *Remembering that living an easeful life is actually quite easeful. WOW! Good morning on that one! BIG shift. LOL ~ Oh! My life is beautiful!

Appreciations for 08/31/10

*The western medical world knows what they're doing when they're really needed. *My friend who is brave enough to reach out when the world is collapsing. *Crisp autmunal air in the morning. *Good science fiction movies. *Good questions. *Curiosity. *Enjoying school. (If I'm going to do this, I'm glad I'm enjoying it!) *Honesty. *Open space. ~ I'm loving my life.

Appreciations for 08/30/10

*Waking up to the most awesome hail/lightning/thunder/rain storm I've ever seen. WOW! *Good music that has me bouncing around happily as I start my day. *Working with a team of people who match my vision of health and healing. *Being able to collaborate with the owners of Migun. *Feeling relaxed and calm as a result of surrendering to trust. *Looking out the window to see the piles of hail and dark, dark clouds and perceiving it as winter and then feeling excited about that. I'm weird, I know. LOL *Softly boiled eggs. *Music that reminds me of growing up. *Being found on Facebook by a boy I once had a major crush on in fifth grade and being able to share joint memories of being young and carefree. *Watching my daughter do her hair. When did she start caring about doing her hair???? ~ I am so grateful for this life I have been given.

Appreciations for 08/25/10

*Today is my baby's first day of eighth grade! *Learning the truth about specific situations so that I remain safe. *Remembering: I am loveable! *Working with my best friend and having it feel like PLAY all day long! * While we were working, the yard guy came to do her yard. He said, "What are you two doing in there??? You just keep laughing and laughing!" "Working," we answered. And, then we laughed some more. *Receiving a letter I wrote to myself a year ago about what THIS past year was like. Wrote it last August as if it had already happened. AMAZING how much it matched up with what truly ended up happening! The power of suggestion!!! *I go back to school tomorrow and feel excited to do so. YAY ME! ~ My life is a beautiful dance and I'm happy about that.

Appreciations for 08/24/10

*One day closer to the beginning of Fall Semester. Actually feeling a bit of the old first-day-of-school-jitters. Funny. *Learning that I am loveable and feeling surprised to uncover that fact, Funny. *Laughing with my best friend ALL DAY yesterday and playing like we were working. Funny. *Finding "funny" in a lot of things. *The color yellow. Funny. (Yeah. It's not really funny, but it seemed like a let down to not have it be. LOL) ~ I'm feeling SO happy to BE alive on this beautiful autumn day!

Appreciations for 08/23/10

*My computer is BACK and HEALTHY!!! No more bugs! YAY! Thank you, Booger! *I'm learning through experience when to speak and when to stay silent and that BOTH stances are being in my power. *Learning when to get in and when to get out. That's a tricky one! *Listening, taking it in and knowing what is true for me even if it doesn't match the other person's opinion of me. That is a an amazing feeling! *The interesting sounds of the garbage truck in the early morning. *Going forward in the face of fear and trusting that, in my blindness, I will be led to the places I'm needed. *Being able to call my friend and say, "I need to vent. Just listen to me because it's not going to be pretty nor is it going to be enlightened. I just need to get it out and THEN I'll be open for feedback." And so it is. ~ I am appreciating the life I am creating.

Appreciations for 08/22/10

*My brother KILLED my computer virus! GOOD! Yes! *Supporting my uncle as he crossed the finish line of his 100th marathon yesterday. *Watching my brother cross the finish line of his first marathon in the same marathon as my uncle. He looked GREAT and was smiling! *Listening to his wife speak at the awards ceremony , on behalf of my brother, for the Utah Foster Care Foundation. *Watching the hits increase exponentially on my brother's website www.run2100.com. *Feeling so proud of my baby brother's commitment to serve and his willingness to do so lovingingly. *Spending the night babysitting my nephew. What a blessing! *Finding a quick, easeful solution for easing trauma and witnessing IMMEDIATE results! ~ I am in love with my life!

Appreciations for 08/19/10

*My daughter is planning for her first "Big Girl" haircut today. She's getting "swishy bangs". She has started wearing make up. She's entering EIGHTH GRADE! When did she get so grown up??? *The quietness of the morning. *Staying awake until 5:30am with my best friend, laughing our guts out and healing. *Being introduced to new things. *Late night walks. *Cloudy skies. ~ I love BEING alive!

Appreciations for 08/18/10

*Mornings on the porch. WOW! *Feeling the absolute reality of possibilities. *Good music filling the atmosphere on a perfect morning. *Bugs dancing glowingly in the brilliant light of the sunrise. *Breathing. *Seeing the beauty in myself. *Connection across the smallest of spaces without touching at all. *That smile. ~ Man! How I love my life!

Appreciations for 08/16/10

*My friend made it home from her trip safely. *Feeling angels around her. *Spending the day with my daughter. *Playing Monopoly with her and watching her dramatic interpretation of her progress, or lack thereof. *Fresh zucchini out of the garden, battered and fried. *BBQ chicken. *Getting to see friends tonight. *Spending time on the porch with my best friend. ~ I'm LOVING my life.